All close family members have responsibilities when it comes to wedding planning. The bride usually takes on quite a bit while taking the groom along for the ride. Many times women step into the wedding planning process with ease leaving the guys looking at each other. Here is a guide to the responsibilities of the father of the groom during wedding planning to give the proud father a place to start. Remember to clear it all with the newlyweds to be.
Officially welcome the bride to the family once the engagement has been announced. Meet her parents.
Paying for things – If the father (and mother) of the groom wish to contribute financially there are a few things that are traditional for the groom’s family to contribute towards. They include:
- the attire for the groom, groomsmen and ushers
- corsages, boutonnieres, the bride’s bouquet
- the rehearsal dinner and related expenses
- after party and related expenses
Times have changed and sometimes the groom’s family will now contribute to transportation costs and other expenses. It is important not to offer what can’t realistically be afforded. The family of the groom (and the family of the bride) should resist the urge to make too many demands just because they are helping to pay. The wedding is about the bride and groom being married, not their parents.
Stand in the receiving line if asked – Some couples will have a receiving line at the start of the reception or after the ceremony in the church or other ceremony venue. Sometimes just the bride and groom will be in the line, other times they will ask their families to stand with them. Be sure to know what the couple expects and happily oblige.
Dance – The couple may wish their parents to join them on the first dance. The father of the groom will traditionally dance with the mother of the groom, or his stepmother depending on the family and wishes of the couple. It is also traditional for the father of the groom to dance with the bride at some point during the evening.
Give advice when asked – If the couple needs ideas on venues or adding to the guest list be prepared to give it. Also keep track of any RSVPs that come from people that the father of the groom added to the guest list and promptly get them to the bride and groom.
The father of the groom may need to make a speech.
Make sure all guests are holding their liquor well and deal with any problems that arise regarding inebriation.
The father of the groom and father of the bride are often some of the last to leave on the evening of the wedding. They make sure everyone gets away safely (calling cabs for inebriated guests etc.) and that all bills have been settled.
Be general moral support for the groom and bride as needed.
The father of the groom may sometimes feel like just a checkbook or unneeded accessory but that is far from true. Some of the most important roles in planning a wedding are support roles and doing the little things behind the scenes that make everything run smoothly.