For centuries, asking for a parent’s blessing or permission to marry their daughter has been a standard part of an engagement. The perspective groom would present gifts of enticement to the intended bride’s family to gain their approval. The gifts were often livestock, cloth, spices, gold and silver. If the exchange was deemed worthy, the parents would give him permission to ask for the daughter’s hand in marriage. Now asking for a woman’s hand in marriage is sometimes viewed as an antiquated practice. But if done correctly, it can be a beautiful and meaningful moment, and an opportunity to both honor and bond with your future in-laws.
The principle behind asking her parents is to convey your sincere love for their daughter and your intention to have her hand in marriage. When asking for their daughter’s hand in marriage, let them know you promise to take care of her in every way possible and that you love her with all your heart and that you will cherish and protect her. You also might want to let them know how you intend to take care of her financially. It will make her parents feel more at ease knowing that you are able to take care of their little girl.
What is the best way to ask for their permission? If you live close-by, the easiest thing to do is to call and ask if you can stop by for a moment as you have something to ask them. They’ll probably suspect, but that’s okay as it will give them time to be prepared and know what to say. If you are friends with them, you might see if they want to go out to dinner. If her parents live far away, try to call at a time when you think they’ll be home. If her parents are still married, and you happen to call at a time when only one is available, simply say that you have something you want to ask them, but would like to wait until you can ask them both together and when would be a good time to do so.
Read Part 2