Well you made it through the proposal and you seemed a little stressed over this event. Not that I want you stressed you out, but this is the most important ceremony you may ever be involved in and your bride/groom is depending you to keep them sane.
Here’s some of my advice;
Make sure you are in control, not your mother or father. Just because someone may be helping you out a bit does not mean that you are under their control. From now on you have your own family to decide for and you don’t have to make anyone happy except each other…….FOREVER! (My wife likes to say “forever “in a creepy voice).
So find those little quirks and small moments you and your whatever love in each other. Small moments add up to big moments and big moments you will remember forever.
This is the tricky part that you may or may not be involved in, be careful because the rabbit hole can keep going as long as you let it. I must say that this is your wedding and you do what you want. Don’t let someone else boss you around and control everything, this day of days can set the mood for the whole marriage. The best bet for travelling guests is for you to get pricing on local hotels and mention what they will be in town for (they might give you a break). We used a wedding website and posted information like this on there for anyone to access at any time, this makes mass communication better and it is the trend for our current age of man. I had family in from all over, my mother and father entertained, which means a big meal with local sight seeing. It may be different for you, just remember it is ok to take charge and direct people (they already bought their gifts at this point). Don’t be afraid to stand up at the rehearsal and say “shut up”. You are in this for life and these are the people you will be dealing with forever. But you are starting a new family and this means you take care of them first nothing else is more important than having each others’ backs.
Parents and In-laws
Well this one is tough. Mothers want to do everything they can for their children. Dads want to give you their advice from experience and television. Children want to make their parents happy. Let them help out but not control. Listen to the same story you both have already heard ten times or more. They are your parents, they love you, and they annoy the crap out of you. This is life and only for a short while, then it’s time for you to make your own future and one day annoy the crap out of your children.
We are poor and cheap is good, less than $4,000 for everything. Although our wedding looked and felt like we spent near $15,000. We are fun loving people that work hard and tend to create things we want instead of pay outrageous prices for everything.
I just don’t see the point for having $12.00 a plate for mediocre food like you ate in the high school cafeteria.
Most of the time you end up with luke warm food (chicken or beef) with cold vegetables and boring salads. The other alternative is buffet style and we know how fun it is to wait in line forever. If that is the case the seniors go first, then your party, followed by the guests.
Get inventive and be fun. Don’t think you have to do something a certain way.
We decided from the start that we wanted our venue to be fun. A hot dog and nacho bar was the ticket! Let me tell you, it’s been months and people are still talking about how cool our reception and wedding was. Another awesome idea my wife added (though it was pricey) was a candy bar. Borrowed glass jars with candy worms, candy necklaces, and so on; basically candy from our childhood. We also purchased blow up guitars for kids and drink cozies for grown ups with “To have and to hold and keep your drink cold”. It was a hit, trust me people love cheesy fun times versus the same old routine. We chose to use products that may have a small defect, but we got a large quantity cheap. Who cares if there is a white dot on four out of one hundred pieces.
Here are some numbers for your brain:
Wedding budgets are apparently on the rise, topping out at an average of $27,021. There’s a multi-billion-dollar industry eager to tell you how to spend every last bit of it.
What if some of the funds used for the big day were, instead, used to ease the transition, reduce the stresses and clean up the messy realities of married life? We all have some debt somewhere.
The $12,116 the average couple spends on a reception can pay big dividends for working parents with a baby and a toddler in tow. A family of four can use those funds to hire a personal chef to shop for groceries and prepare and pre-package a year’s worth of work-night meals.
Rather than drop an average $5,130 for an engagement ring go to the pawn shop, find something you love for less than half the price. Besides most diamonds are not conflict free (look it up). Meteor stones seem more exquisite to me.
A band could cost $3,122. Hiring a DJ instead ($929). We hand picked all of our music, so we basically needed someone to play the songs from a lap top, announce, and a p.a. to use. Total price less than one hundred dollars. Bam!
Your wedding budget is really just an accumulation of choices. Before you spring for the stuff you think will matter, give some thought to what is around you, who is around you, and what your marriage needs to succeed.
Then there is the honeymoon.