The Second Time Around

If you are beginning to plan an ‘encore" wedding, do not assume your parents will be willing to finance the event. The financial responsibility lies with you, and your groom. If a family member, or close friend, offers you help financially, you may accept graciously and show your appreciation.

Your parents may offer their home as the site, or agree to cover the cost of food. Some parents may even want to write you a check to help with your wedding expenses. Again, accept the gift, and let them know how much their support means to you.

Be sure to discuss finances with each other before the wedding. It may be a difficult subject to cover, but it needs to be done. Many people feel that talking about money matters will spoil the romantic feeling leading up to the wedding, when actually it will have the opposite effect. The exchange of difficult information and good communication can ease anxieties and eventually find solutions to any problems that may have been discovered.

Money conflicts are one of the major contributors to divorce, so you should be prepared to discuss your regular income, inheritance money, retirement funds, material assets, child or spousal support payments, tax liabilities, pending lawsuits, any financial help to family members, money management, credit card debt and insurance policies.

Other important topics to discuss would be future plans, such as whether or not you will want to have children together, who will move into whose home, any health or emotional problems and, if children are in the picture, parenting styles. All of these subjects need to be openly, and honestly, discussed before you take that second walk down the aisle.

If either of you refuse to talk about one, or more, of these topics, this should be a big red flag! Do not embark on another marriage if the lines of communication are not open. So many couples just assume that everything will fall into place once the wedding is over. This is unrealistic. Be sensible, be honest with each other, and you will be ready for you new life together.

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