Asking the Parents for Permission Part 2

Now, what do you say? Start out by saying a sentence or two about your love for their daughter. Then say something about why you feel now is the time to move the relationship to the next level, and follow it by asking for their blessing. For example, you might say, "As you know, I love your daughter very much. She is the most beautiful, intelligent and loving woman a man could ever ask for. We’ve been together for almost three years now, and I can’t imagine spending my life with anyone else but her. I would like to ask her to marry me and I’m here today to ask you for your blessing." It is simple, yet sweet.

What do you do if her parents are divorced? If her parents get along still, ask them out to dinner and ask them both for permission for their daughter’s hand in marriage. If her parents don’t get along, you should ask them separately. First, ask the parent she has lived with most (or ask the parent that is the most approachable) and then ask the other parent. If she is estranged from one of her parents, just ask the parent she is closest to. This situation will need to be handled with the utmost delicacy.

You’ve made all the plans and prepared your speech, now what do you do if her parents say no? If her parents do not give their blessing, don’t lose your temper and fly off the handle. Find out why they will not give their blessing. Perhaps they want you to finish school or have a steady job before getting married. You should discuss the situation with your girlfriend, but avoid asking her to take sides. Decide together whether it is best to wait until you can earn their blessing or go against her parents wishes. Try your best to appreciate their reasoning since the decision almost certainly comes out of love for their daughter.

Good Luck!

Read Part 1

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